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Did you hear about the pregnant blonde who went to the grocery store because she heard they had free delivery.

Dasha Markova

A sailor in New orleans has only a dollar to have a good time with. He spends half on a pack of cigarettes and a beer and offers the remaining 50 cents to a tough whore. She accepts. She takes him to her untidy place and immediately bends over and throws up her dress, presenting her anus to him. "Come on, turn around," the sailor says angrily. "I don't want to butt-fuck." "Buô you do want to open that bottle, don't you?" says the whore.

THE BUISNESSMAN TOOK THE YOUNG SECRETARY TO A MOTEL ROOM. THE girl SEEMED SHY AND INEXPERIENCED, SO THE MAN DECIDED HE WOULD BE HER TUTOR IN THE ARTS OF LOVE. HE BEGAN BY RUNNING HIS HANDS OVER HER CHEST. DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'M DOING? HE ASKED? NO SHE REPLIED... I'M FONDLING YOUR BREASTS. THEN HE MOVED HIS HAND DOWN TO THE SOFT V BETWEEN HER LEGS AND ASKED. DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'M DOING NOW? WHEN SHE REPLIED, NO, HE EXPLAINED HHE WAS CARESSING HER CLITORIS. THE HE BECAME SO AROUSED THAT HE SPREAD HER LEGS AND THRUST HIS PINIS INTO HER. DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'M DOING NOW? HE PANTED... YES SHE RESPONDED COOLY. YOU'RE CATCHING HERPES......

THE BUISNESSMAN TOOK THE YOUNG SECRETARY TO A MOTEL ROOM. THE girl SEEMED SHY AND INEXPERIENCED, SO THE MAN DECIDED HE WOULD BE HER TUTOR IN THE ARTS OF LOVE. HE BEGAN BY RUNNING HIS HANDS OVER HER CHEST. DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'M DOING? HE ASKED? NO SHE REPLIED... I'M FONDLING YOUR BREASTS. THEN HE MOVED HIS HAND DOWN TO THE SOFT V BETWEEN HER LEGS AND ASKED. DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'M DOING NOW? WHEN SHE REPLIED, NO, HE EXPLAINED HHE WAS CARESSING HER CLITORIS. THE HE BECAME SO AROUSED THAT HE SPREAD HER LEGS AND THRUST HIS PINIS INTO HER. DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'M DOING NOW? HE PANTED... YES SHE RESPONDED COOLY. YOU'RE CATCHING HERPES......

A woman goes into a hardware store and wanders around for a while and picks up a hinge. She wanders around a while longer and captures the attention of a clerk, who watches her. She finally settles down in one certain aisle, and just kind of hangs there. Eventually, the clerk walks over to her and asks, "Can I give you a screw for that hinge?" "No," she says, "but I'll give you a blowjob for that electric toaster."

Two young starlets are discussing the sessions they have just had with the movie producer. "Did he give you a good part?" asks one. "No he did not!" replies the other. "Why he made me such a ridiculous offer, I just laughed right in his balls."

Q. Why do men die before their wives?
A. They want to.

A woman goes into a hardware store and wanders around for a while and picks up a hinge. She wanders around a while longer and captures the attention of a clerk, who watches her. She finally settles down in one certain aisle, and just kind of hangs there. Eventually, the clerk walks over to her and asks, "Can I give you a screw for that hinge?" "No," she says, "but I'll give you a blowjob for that electric toaster."

Kori Kitten

Q. What do you call a virgin on a waterbed?
A. A cherry float.

Do you know what the square root of 69 is?
Ate something (8.xxxxxxx....)